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Shakers: Prattle And Roll

Vic Reeves, Boogie Woogie

From six games unbeaten to three defeats on the spin – well, that escalated quickly… didn’t it? It looks like having a small squad has given us a few headaches, what with 137 players now on Paul Dando’s treatment table. Yep, we’re now just two knocks away from replacing the halftime Tyre Challenge with a round of conscription. So, be sure to take shin pads along to this one.

Bury are the next visitors to the Lamex for what will be our first Tuesday night game of 2015. These fixtures have a special place in the heart of us Boro’ fans as we tend to do well when we’re under floodlights on our own patch – and before the working week has crushed our spirit thanks to the latest dumb email from Cuthbert in accounts. He just needs to turn it off and on again.

The Shakers are seventh in the table and are, at the moment, the main club to benefit from our recent slump. But their form of late screams “inconsistent”, with an equal number of wins, losses and draws from their last six. On the road, too, Bury are quite average – half of their quota away from Gigg Lane have gone the way of their hosts and we’ll happily add to that run of misery.

Of course, the question we have to ask is “can we?” – after all, the loss of Deano, Tom and Adam have shaken us up a bit. That’s not to say that Bruno and Danny can’t fill the gap, but we can’t be expecting the world of them at short notice. By the time Bury park up at the Lamex, our loansome pair will have managed to squeeze in a mere four days of training in. At best.

We’re still quite a formidable prospect at home, despite going down to Oxford in our last showing on home turf. In fact, we’ve only failed to score in 7 per cent of our home games. Bury have scored in nearly two-thirds of their away days, so we shouldn’t be too short of a goal or two this Tuesday evening. It’s just on which side the goals will fall that worries us at the moment.

No FIFA verdict this time – we couldn’t run the risk of picking up any more injuries…

If you don’t know where your money is going on this one, then you won’t find much help from the bookmakers either. We are priced at 13/8 for the win, them at 15/8 – you see? Both teams to score is 5/6 at BetVictor and you’ll be able to find 11/10 on Over 2.5 Goals if you shop around. Jo N’Guessan is fours at Paddy Power to score at any point during the regulation 90…

And there you go. Short of doling out the hilarious quips about Burying them. Or something that puns the living crikey out of Oasis’ Shakermaker, we haven’t got much else to offer you. Winston Churchill had blood, sweat and tears to offer – and that’s probably what made him a better man than we’ll ever be – but we always prefer to be clean and fragrant anyway. Onwards!

Whaddya make ‘a da Shakers? Here’s all the necessary info on Bury Football Club

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